Prologue: Happy Valentine's Day

[Eanwulf]

MOOD MUSIC
The Indiana Gazette
Thursday February 14th, 2013

WORLD CRISIS AVERTED!!!
Joint Effort By The United Nations Saves The Day
At 6:15 AM on February 14th 2013, an asteroid heading towards Earth was shot down by the combined global efforts of the United Nations. After months of planning, the coordinated launch of low-grade nuclear ICBMs was finally fired into outer space. Three hours later, the staggered barrage of missiles collided with what scientists believed to be a potential Class II "World-Damaging" form of asteroid in the Earth's Outer-Exosphere. Measuring nearly a half of a kilometer in length, the ten football field long object was then detonated by the blasts caused by the ICBMs and reduced into tiny meteoroids that were later burnt up upon entry into the Earth's atmosphere.

The World truly rejoices today, a holiday for most (especially those of us here in Indiana, PA) as scientists continue to monitor the meteors' fallout, making sure that all is indeed well for the Planet Earth on this Valentine's Day 2013. NASA's Chief Scientist Dr. Waleed Abdalati reassures us that whatever fragments left by the Asteroid are sure to have been reduced to nothing more than mere space dust and that the nuclear fallout caused by the missiles shall remain in space. Though the good Dr. remains quite confident, Chief Scientist Abdalati likewise assures us that any and all updates will continue to be broadcast to the public as needed, should the need for any concerns arise.

Meanwhile today, lovers everywhere - both young and old - are celebrating Valentine's Day in style...

[Eanwulf]

The Indiana Gazette
Monday February 18th, 2013

Weather Forecast
Today's Highs are expected to be in the Low to Mid 30's. Gusty winds are expected to come from out of the NW and for the most part the day should be quite overcast. Otherwise, it's fair weather for those of us here in Indiana PA and signs indicate that we are due to warm up a little overnight. There are however an unforeseen shift in the local weather patterns that indicate some chance of precipitation occurring sometime tomorrow afternoon to late evening time. That's about it for us here. Rest well Indiana!