Fellowship of the Dice

..The Great Gimpy was struck by the most horrible case of Violent Explosive Diarrhea he ever did have! "oh, shit" he thought; His spell miscast landing on the poor pummeled Gnome's noise.
The Pauper, being caught off guard by the noise of the exploding diarrhea...

...and the nasty looking... thing ... hanging outta the gnome's nose (what do you call a 'roid hanging outta the nose, anyways? oh well, that's not important to this story). That was one of the nastiest things that the Pauper had seen to date, second only to...

...That smell from his vomit out side... which.. thinking of that.. made him rember the smell.. one of them phamtom smells that you get from something soooo nasty soooo.. well.. bad... His stomuck turned then growled again and up came the rest of that chinies food from the Dumpster Bar and Grill.

That poor poor Gnome was covered in it...

..Finially, the Gnome simply got up and left. Well he tried to leave, he had taken the worst beating of his life, had a nasal hemroid, was forced to dance the can-can way back, was shit on, spit on, and in all other ways physically embassared. So he got u to leave shouting at the top of his lungs. "You people that write theis crap are sick! Sick! Sick! Sick."


Unfortunately, one of the people telling the poor Gnomes tale herd him and the next thing that happen was the worse yet. He was forced to...

... live inside the Pauper's butt, forever! Yet much reduced inside, now the Gnome became a Butt Gnome, to live in a butt forevermore!

The Pauper didn't mind however, because the Gnome now was the size of a fist, and he never noticed.

Anyway, the Great Gimp finally approached the Pauper, and said ...

..."Lo! Pauper! Though you are foul, and stink like rancid vomit, and though a gnome now dwells in your butt, you are more than you may seem! You pauper, are the saviour of our nation!" He grumbled a bit to himself at having to stand down wind from the man, but continued. "Our fair lady has... well frankly I forget what, but you must save the day by..."

The Pauper interjects.. "Ya smell like Shiiitaaat and yer callin' me foul! ha! now dats funny" Gimpy, having already soiled him self, was abit pev'd at the Paupers remark. "Dun-frizt Ye" with that the Great Gimpy sent a small but anoying shock though the Pauper. "now. you'll let me finish or you'll have more of that Mr. Pauper"

The Pauper leaned in and begain to hear Gimpys words, his hair still standing on end and smoking...

... "The queen is quite a piece of ass!" laughed the Great Gimp, his mind still wondering to the brothel he was supposed to be visiting at this very moment.

"Errr, I mean, the queen is in trouble! And you my lad are the only one who can save her!"

The Great Gimp winked, "And you know what the reward will be, a nice ....

"....ham sandwich." What no one realizes is that ham is in rare supply in this strange kingdom, and a ham sandwich could easily be worth 2 or 3 dollars depending on if there was cheese with it or not. Anyhow, the Pauper nodded to the Great Gimp replying...

.. "Well.. All ya 'ad ta do was say she is a good piece of ass! I'll do it! She cute?"

Gimpy paulmed his face at this reply and sighed then looked up "... this is are only hope? you've got to be shitin' me.. oh well... we have alot of work to do drunk, lets start with a shower and coffie"

with that, they were off to Gimpy's tower for the bath when...