Diplomacy 3 - Press center

Diplomacy is a strategic board game. Its main distinction from most board wargames is negotiation: Players spend much of their time forming (and betraying) alliances with other players. Set in Europe just before the beginning of World War I , Diplomacy is played by seven players, each controlling the armed forces of a major European power.
MadVlat
Level 17 Elite
Level 17 Elite
Posts: 6867

Re: Diplomacy 3

Post by MadVlat » Sun Oct 23, 2011 10:56 pm

:cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:
...And the stone of the earth and the wind in the sky bowed before the wisdom of the Ancient One...

EvilMonkey
Level 12
Level 12
Posts: 1332

Re: Diplomacy 3

Post by EvilMonkey » Mon Oct 24, 2011 4:45 pm

The Moscow Sun

Russian Relief Fleets Dispatched to Rumania

Our Tzar, after hearing of the plight of the Rumanian people due to a massive crop blight, has dispatched an entire fleet laden with food to give aid to our neighbors to the southwest. The fleet, composed of the fastest ships in the Russian Navy, have been laden with thousands of tons of potatoes, beets, wheat, and pork, as well as a hefty supply of vodka. All in an effort to ease the suffering of the Rumanian populace. The Rumanian Government has sent a statement to the Imperial palace thanking the Tzar for his magnanamous actions, and ethical treatment of their starving people. The letter also contained words of scorn for the Austrian leadership, who pledged support but never sent it instead choosing to bully the small nation of Serbia by marching an army into their largely unprepared and defenseless lands.
Here, you hold this jar of acid and the rattlesnake. I've got to hop on the unicycle and get this chainsaw revved up.

User avatar
Vardaen
Admin
Admin
Posts: 66367
Location: Miskatonic University
Title: Great Old One
User Class: Unshackled AI

Re: Diplomacy 3

Post by Vardaen » Mon Oct 24, 2011 5:12 pm

Paris Gazette

France withdrawls from world stage.

The French leaders, President Emile Loubet and Premier Ministre René Waldeck Rosseau who neither attended Turkey's so called peace summit and who were in fact holding a large public speech in the famous square Place de la Bastille, and were seen by some 10,000 French patriots at the same time as Turkey's supposed summit spoke out. They have made it clear that France shall not participate in the blatant slander and out right lies the other nations seem to have begun to do. "We withdraw from the mockery that foreign nations have made the press into these days."

This game's name is Diplomacy, yet some how people have made it in to an insult game. I did not sign up for this, and while guilty of being swept up it to that at the start I attempted to make a change some time back, but I refuse to take part in this aspect of the 'game'. Who can insult the other person more, and post the actions of the other person's primary characters (leaders, like presidents, or kings, etc).

I apologize to Amaris, Mylvest and Hayabusa for this, and to Grimbold especially as this is his game, I feel bad its turned into a mockery of what Diplomacy should be thanks to a few bad apples.

I shall of course continue to post my troop movements, and am more than open to PM to my allies. I shall not check this thread anymore.
"He that breaks a thing to find out what it is has left the path of wisdom." - Gandalf
J.R.R. Tolkien, Council of Elrond, The Fellowship of the Ring

User avatar
Hayabusa
Level 25 Mythic
Level 25 Mythic
Posts: 15431
Location: Ireland
Title: Advocatus Diaboli
User Class: Alliance Officer

Re: Diplomacy 3

Post by Hayabusa » Mon Oct 24, 2011 7:51 pm

Frankfurter Rundschau

German Chancellor pleased by French reactions

Sources inside the Reichstag report that Chancellor Stahlstark seems to be delighted by the French cowards who are to afraid to enter the stage. "At least they'll stop ralking now. If they stopped breathing too all of Europe would applaud in respect," the Minister of Beer said during a meeting after standing ovations by the whole parliament. Some people say that it was all the adulterate wine that forced the French to shut up as wine and bread is no longer available on the markets in the cities near the border to France.

While there has been even more rumors about the French weaklings German troops were reloacted along the border to the East and the West as a reaction to the sudden troop movements on the continent.
Image
"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us."

MadVlat
Level 17 Elite
Level 17 Elite
Posts: 6867

Re: Diplomacy 3

Post by MadVlat » Mon Oct 24, 2011 8:25 pm

"TURKISH TRIBUNE" Turkish Triumph

Spokesmen for our beloved Emir announced today our military's glorious triumph over the French born thugee's in Bulgaria. Bulgarian peasants lined the three dirt roads leading to their capitol, as Turkey's 15,000 troops hunted down the remnants of the now fleeing "Le Frog" members. Fearing for the well being of the southern Balkan states, our illustrious and benevolent leader has promised to expand his military presence throughout the region within the next twelve months to insure their safety...

In other news Emir Tootsie Baba announced that possible border disputes with Russia may result in hostilities. Disputes derived from Black Sea salt mining operations turned heated as russian fleet blocks Rumania sea ports from turkish imports...
Last edited by MadVlat on Thu Oct 27, 2011 1:21 pm, edited 1 time in total.
...And the stone of the earth and the wind in the sky bowed before the wisdom of the Ancient One...

User avatar
Amaris
Level 10
Level 10
Posts: 868

Re: Diplomacy 3

Post by Amaris » Mon Oct 24, 2011 9:17 pm

Der National Enquirer
1901 Montag 15. März
Ghostly Goethe gesichtet in lokalen Sudhaus, behauptete er Zeugen "put wieder ein paar" und dann verschwunden!

Lotte Lehman claims "ich zwanzig Kilo abgenommen auf Apfelstrudel Diät".

Russische Zar in skandalösen Affäre mit bärtigen Dame aus der Berliner Circus am österreichischen Gala gefangen.

Deutsch Beamten bewegen Kanzleramt zu Herrentoilette wie ein Witz.

Präsident Emile Loubet und Premier Ministre René Waldeck Rousseau gefangen in "Lip Lock" an der Place de la Bastille.

Türkische Emit Tootsie Baba glaubte an Verschwörungstheorien mit dem russischen Zaren werden, zeigt bärtige Dame alle.

Englands neuer Premierminister Neville Baldwin fashion faux pas bei Einweihung.
The National Enquirer
1901 Monday March 15

Ghostly Goethe sighted in local brew house, witnesses claimed he "put back a few" and then disappeared!

Lotte Lehman claims "I lost twenty pounds on apfelstrudel diet".

Russian Tzar caught in scandalous affair with bearded lady from the Berlin Circus at Austrian Gala.

German officials move chancellor's office to men's bathroom as a joke.

President Emile Loubet and Premier Ministre René Waldeck Rosseau caught in “lip lock” at Place de la Bastille.

Turkish Emit Tootsie Baba believed to be in conspiracy with Russian Tzar, bearded lady reveals all.

England's new prime minister Neville Baldwin fashion faux pas at inauguration.
7 chipmunks twirlin' on a branch, eatin' lots of sunflowers on my uncle's ranch. You know that old children's tale from the sea.

EvilMonkey
Level 12
Level 12
Posts: 1332

Re: Diplomacy 3

Post by EvilMonkey » Mon Oct 24, 2011 9:40 pm

The St. Petersburg Star

French Dictator's Mother Sends Tzar Letter

Today, the Imperial Palace received a letter from the French Dictator's mother. The Tzar has seen fit to release this letter to the Russian public and the world at large in light of the recent French withdrawal from the world stage. He has also given us this statement; "I must say that this move was rather expected, the French are notorious cowards. How could they possibly expect to stand up to the might of the Russian public's ridicule and disdain." He is also quoted as saying; "The French attempts at harrasment and censorship have not gone unnoticed and a state of war has been declared on the nation of crappy wine, stale bread, and women with hairy armpits." Now without further ado, the letter sent to the Tzar:

My dearest Tzar,

As you well know, my son is a delicate boy. He is not up to trading insults with fine examples of manhood such as yourself. After yours and Turkey's various light-handed jibes were published in your nations newspapers, he immediately took to his room. He has not come out for 12 hours and keeps calling the Servants for more kleenex and chocolate ice cream. I know you have in prior correspondance told him that it is all just in the spirit of fun, but he is far too sensitive to bear even the lightest of jabs. I know you did not mean to hurt his feelings but if you could kindly stop giving him any grief at all that would be much appreciated.

Yours,
Marie Cul-Blesse


The Tzar has also given us a copy of his formal reply;

My dear Madam,

I am sorry that your son has taken such words so seriously. However if he is not up to a little criticism then he should never have run for public office in the first place. He should have known exactly what it would entail. Your son has sent threats and attempted to censor the freedom of the press, and I can not have that. I am sorry to say but war has been declared on your nation due to public sentiment. I would suggest fleeing Europe as quickly as possible to avoid becoming a casualty. I had honestly hoped that he would have better judgment than to do such things as he has but unfotunately that is not the case.

Sincerely,
Tzar Dmitri Zloi-Obez'yana

I have edited this letter drastically. But I am reposting it out of staunch refusal to be censored and threatened by a moderator because of a personal vendetta. I will be lodging a complaint with the other admins stating abuse of power and a refusal to separate real world issues from games.
Here, you hold this jar of acid and the rattlesnake. I've got to hop on the unicycle and get this chainsaw revved up.

User avatar
Grimbold
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 10234
Location: Austria
Title: Professor
User Class: Rogue Trader

Re: Diplomacy 3

Post by Grimbold » Tue Oct 25, 2011 12:11 pm

US President Abraham P. Grim concerned about vitriol in European newspapers.
Ok, guys, come down. It is a game. It is supposed to be fun. If you are not having fun, I am not having fun.
So: Please tone down your newspaper articles - try to speak about a nation in general, instead of insulting a leader. Avoid argumenta ad personam, please. You can still write about the "evil and treacherous Italians who attacked innocent Vienna", but keep personal vitriol away from this. It IS just a game and should not be taken too seriously, but if not everyone is having fun, I do not see the point in playing - or organising this.
Feel free to comment, or pm me. I can also organize a poll. We have had this before (three years ago) so everyone just try and make this game as enjoyable as possible for everyone (but try to win the game of course!).

EvilMonkey
Level 12
Level 12
Posts: 1332

Re: Diplomacy 3

Post by EvilMonkey » Wed Oct 26, 2011 4:11 pm

The Warsaw Times

Austrians Threaten Borders

The Austrians have sent an army to rest directly on our border, this is very worrying considering the tense nature of diplomatic relations between our two empires. The Tzar fears an imminent attack and calls to his German and Turkish allies to help in halting the Austrian advance which he fears will become an all out attack. In his recent speech on the steps of the Imperial palace he is quoted as saying; "If the Austrians attack us, I shall not rest until the entire nation is burnt to the ground and the earth beneath them is salted. And once negotiations with the Turkish Emir are completed, be assured, we will have enough salt for the task. I will do the deed with a minimum of resources and stress on the Russian people."
Here, you hold this jar of acid and the rattlesnake. I've got to hop on the unicycle and get this chainsaw revved up.

MadVlat
Level 17 Elite
Level 17 Elite
Posts: 6867

Re: Diplomacy 3

Post by MadVlat » Thu Oct 27, 2011 1:34 pm

"TURKISH TRIBUNE" Turkish Emir Outraged

High counsellor Cahca announced today that Austria will be hard fought for their transgressions towards the Balkan states and agressive actions towards her Russian neighbors. In the same conference Germany's treachery was noted with seething rage. The turkish emir has promised a force of 12,000 goat calvarymen and 16,000 camel born artillary troops to their Russian brethern's defensive actions. Cahca was overheard as saying, "I hear Vienna is lovely this time of year. Perhaps I shall build a summer yurt there next year"...

Image
Last edited by MadVlat on Sat Nov 05, 2011 6:05 am, edited 2 times in total.
...And the stone of the earth and the wind in the sky bowed before the wisdom of the Ancient One...

Post Reply